what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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