so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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