i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
