I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
What drink are we having for lunch?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
