The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
