My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The uberlube is also flammable
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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