once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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