He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
