so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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