You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Randomize
