I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize