no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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