I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
