Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
