i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
