just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
