Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize