just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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