I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Randomize
