I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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