I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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