I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
