Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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