Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
