Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
