maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize