I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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