tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
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She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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