I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
the day after is always just damage control
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
