Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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