They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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