it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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