it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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