Texts From Last Night

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  (+44): View more from England

  Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying

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  (+44): Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying http://tfl.nu/14fx
  Replies (62) Good night (6669) Bad night (918)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me

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  (940): there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me http://tfl.nu/wugh
  Replies (65) Good night (908) Bad night (20457)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation

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  (303): I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation http://tfl.nu/w0jl
  Replies (9) Good night (6875) Bad night (1158)
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  (310): View more from California

  He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone

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  (310): He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone http://tfl.nu/3ij4
  Replies (18) Good night (6557) Bad night (1023)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.

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  (717): reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control. http://tfl.nu/bdi5
  Replies (15) Good night (1172) Bad night (3918)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1

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  (347): I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1 http://tfl.nu/kfm1
  Replies (5) Good night (2245) Bad night (1022)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..

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  (678): there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub.. http://tfl.nu/f53v
  Replies (4) Good night (1275) Bad night (596)
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  (716): View more from New York

  OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.

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  (716): OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night. http://tfl.nu/sz8o
  Replies (9) Good night (1664) Bad night (828)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.

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  (541): Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk. http://tfl.nu/effc
  Replies (6) Good night (1069) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.

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  (760): He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes. http://tfl.nu/l52c
  Replies (4) Good night (1489) Bad night (543)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.

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  (720): You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist. http://tfl.nu/dze0
  Replies (10) Good night (1739) Bad night (522)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?

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  (803): It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you? http://tfl.nu/tv5z
  Replies (3) Good night (361) Bad night (597)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.

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  (630): like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant. http://tfl.nu/ihww
  Replies (7) Good night (400) Bad night (839)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate

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  (972): I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate http://tfl.nu/d9si
  Replies (2) Good night (272) Bad night (517)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest

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  (201): I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest http://tfl.nu/yr20
  Replies (0) Good night (377) Bad night (266)

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