3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
