this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
