he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize