How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Randomize
