You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
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Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
cat food counts as protein by the way
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
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I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
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