This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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