went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
