Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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