So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
The convent might be a nice break from real life
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
