Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
lets start a swedish sibling band together
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize