The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
