So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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