The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We don't watch enough power rangers
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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