All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
it glows. i had to have it.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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