Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
