Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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