I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i jhust puked up my retainher.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
